Every day, millions of parents get into fights with their kids over everything imaginable. In some cases, these clashes can become loud or even violent. While the child will most likely lose steam and crash, the parent then sits and questions their parenting abilities.
Fret not, you have done nothing wrong, but could use these tips to help with further conflict resolution.
Avoid Argument Vertigo
The biggest challenge in each fight is not the fight itself but withstanding the urge to join it in the beginning. Once a conflict begins, it will only intensify leading to more emotion and more shouting.
It will consume you beyond the physical location of the fight, and you’ll think about it constantly. Ask yourself “is this worth it?” before getting pulled into something you can’t get out of.
Listen To Your Child’s Concerns
Just because you are older than your child does not mean that you are right all the time. Their perspective might be 100% valid, so it is important that you listen to what they have to say. It is too easy to be blinded by the age gap to hear their concerns.
Maybe he thinks you treat him differently than his siblings. Maybe she thinks you have been neglecting her? The only way to know is to listen.
Allow For Some Autonomy
As adults, we forget how badly you want to be your own person when you are young. We tell them when to eat, when to wake up, how to do this, how to do that, but never take a second to think how they would like to do things.
Give your child some autonomy in their lives, especially when it comes to subjects which frequently lead to arguments. Encourage them to fight for themselves instead of fighting you by giving reasons for wanting to do something.